Be Like Khadijah (ra): 5 Ways to Achieve Her Greatness

Assalam’Alaiykum sisters! I want to talk about one of the most amazing women in our religion, the one we have admired since we first learned about her: Khadijah Bint Khuwaylid (ra)!

But specifically, I want to talk about the type of character traits she had and what made her the most valuable woman in Islam… and how we as Muslim women can become just like her, step-by-step, let’s get into it!

Master the Basics

Khadijah (may Allah be pleased with her) holds a unique honour that us women can only crave: she was greeted with Salam by Allah Himself. Now of course if you know her history, Khadijah (ra) went through many hardships and trials after accepting Islam all because she supported her husband (peace be upon him) in his mission and stood up to the truth. But when I think about how Allah says Salam to only this woman out of all women in the world, it makes me think how she was the ideal Muslimah in that time. Someone Allah was pleased with.

So how can we, as Muslim women today, please Allah? By becoming the ideal Muslimah
And becoming the ideal Muslimah is a journey, a journey of what?
Perfecting ourselves.

I’m talking about the basics: salah, fasting, connection with Allah, modesty, moral character. Every day commit to bettering these things in Islam, because Khadijah (ra) was all of these things. As I always say, when you master the basics of Islam first, you’re able to go to that next step into your faith! It will instill discipline, consistency, and devotion in your worship and conduct. To develop good habits and virtuous qualities that shape your character and define your identity as a Muslim woman.

Become the woman who, (and and I pray that we all get this experience) when we’ll finally get to meet Khadijah (ra) in her house in Jannah, that you can sit next to Khadijah (ra) and she will be proud of you for staying steadfast in your faith.

Have you ever thought that if you love Khadijah (ra) so much, what would she have done if she was living your life today? If you are slacking off in Salah, would she allow that to happen? if you have a distant connection with Allah, would she accept that? You know her history, you know how hard she fought for Islam and for the truth and how much she believed in Allah. How can you say that you want to be like Khadijah (ra) when you haven’t even mastered the basics of your faith?

You need that sincere commitment to embodying her virtues and following her example in both words and deeds. if we truly love Khadijah (ra) and inspire to be like her, we must take a critical look at our own lives and assess whether we are truly living up to the standards she has set. Mastering the basics of our faith is the first step, we cannot claim to follow her footsteps if we neglect the fundamental principles of Islam.

Instead we must try to excel in every single one of them as best as we can – and that is the core of being an ideal Muslimah, start believing that you are that ideal Muslimah as Khadijah (ra) was and start committing to it every single day.

Truly know your Lord

When the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) received his very first revelation from Angel Jibreel, we all know the story of how he ran away all the way home from the cave Hira in fear, asking Khadijah (ra) to cover him with a blanket. He was so shaken by the encounter that he told Khadijah (ra) how worried he was about himself and what this encounter could possibly mean for him, in a bad way.

And what did Khadijah (ra) respond?

“Nay! But receive the good tidings! By Allah, Allah will never disgrace you, for by Allah, you keep good relations with your Kith and kin, speak the truth, help the poor and the destitute, entertain your guests generously and assist those who are stricken with calamities.” 

Sahih al-Bukhari 4953

This is a mindset of Khadijah (ra) that we all need to achieve: To truly know Allah, truly understand His compassion. In a moment of fear for our Prophet (peace be upon Him), Khadijah (ra) reaffirms that faith in Allah. She knows that if someone is a good person person, who is conscious of God, and tries their best, that Allah will be pleased with them and that Allah will help them.

Be honest, how many times have we doubted Allah’s Love for us? Acting like He doesn’t want to grant our duas or putting us in trials we think we can’t bear. What does Khadijah (ra) do in this situation? She reminds us that Allah is aware of our efforts and intentions, He will always act in accordance with His Divine wisdom and mercy.

We women and all Muslims in general need to stop thinking negatively about Allah. We need to be aware of how Allah is our Lord, truly know Him and His compassion. Worship Him properly and read the Quran regularly, and you will never have a reason to doubt that faith.

She accepted her Fate

This is something that my dad told me once when he was telling us the story of Khadijah (ra). He pointed out that Khadijah (ra) never once complained how her life went from luxury and ease to poverty and hardship…for 3 years. Not once do we have a Hadith that talks about her lashing out, lamenting, or anything like that. She struggled immensely, of course, but this should show us that she accepted her fate with Allah. And let’s not forget that at some point, (most likely before the hardship) she received the blessing of Allah’s greetings to her and that she will have a house in Paradise near Him.

I firmly believe that this focus on the eternal reward promised by Allah likely provided her with that strength to endure during those difficult times – and that’s exactly what we should do. We need to remember that this world is not our home. Allah will, whether we like it or not, put us through trials to test who is best for Paradise.

Like Khadijah (ra), we should not complain of our hardships but rather navigate them with grace and resilience, because Jannah is the gift that Allah will bestow upon us in return.

She has Proper Priorities

This is something that we all women need to be mindful of when it comes to choosing a husband in life. We need to have the right priorities for what we see in a righteous spouse. Just like Khadijah (ra) did with the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him).

Before she married him, many men sought out to marry her – men who were also rich and noble. But she declined them all. While she was immensely rich herself, it is important to know that she still prioritized qualities such as integrity, character, and piety.

This is when our Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) came in! He worked for her and she was impressed by his moral character and good manners – even though he was poor. As women who will be looking to get married at some point in our lives, we need to have the same mindset that our mother had. Yes, having money and being on the Deen is important, but finding a man who is genuinely a good person who has good character is the most important thing.

And also let’s not forget that she immediately sent a marriage proposal to the Prophet (peace be upon him). Ladies, do not waste unnecessary time or beat around the bush if you found someone you want to marry, get straight to the point :)

She was Charitable

Like almost all great women of Islam, Khadijah (ra)’s charitable spirit was way beyond her personal wealth. She invested in the mission of spreading the word of Islam alongside her husband (peace be upon him). In Surah Al-Baqarah Allah says,

The example of those who spend their wealth in the way of Allah is like a seed [of grain] which grows seven spikes; in each spike is a hundred grains. And Allah multiplies [His reward] for whom He wills. And Allah is all-Encompassing and Knowing. (261)

Quran 2:261

As women aspiring to follow in the footsteps of Khadijah (ra), we should strive to embody her spirit of charity. This is a fundamental aspect of our religion. In our daily lives we have countless opportunities to practice this; whether with monetary donations, volunteering our time and skills, or simply extending a helping hand to those in need!

By embracing charity, we emulate the noble example set by our mother (r.a) and fulfill our duty as compassionate members of society. Even the smallest acts of kindness can make a significant difference in someone’s life and provide immense rewards from Allah.

It’s just a matter of how much you are willing to give – and how much you want to do it for His sake

And there you have sisters, just some few very beautiful things about Khadijah (r.a) that we should all emulate in our lives. I hope this inspired you girls, so that you too, can actually become the woman you’ve been admiring since you first learned about her 🥺 

With love and sisterhood,

Her Deen & Dunya

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